The Guest List Problem: Why You Never Feel Done (And How to Fix It)

If you ever feel like no matter what you do, you just can’t keep up, this post is for you. Keep reading to better understand why this happens and the intentional choice that will help you tackle it.

Imagine I asked you to help me throw a party—but I didn’t tell you how many guests were coming.

How do you think that would feel?

My guess? Stressful and overwhelming. 

Without more details, how would you know:

• How much food to prepare?
• How much seating you’ll need?
• What size cake to buy?

You get the idea. Without clarity, you’re stuck in the dark.

It’s easy to see when talking about a guest list, but harder to recognise in other areas of life. Yet here’s the thing—we do this to ourselves all the time. From our to-do lists to our closets, we never feel done, and we don’t know why. But in this post, I’m sharing some answers.

The Hidden Cost of Not Defining ‘Enough’

There’s always something more you could do. One more thing you could buy. One more task to check off. 

This is the reality of modern-day life: we never feel done, and I understand that responsibilities contribute to it. Many things in our lives are beyond our control, and sometimes, it’s all you can do to keep up. 

But at the same time, don’t let what you can’t control blind you to what you can. 

One of the biggest reasons we feel constantly overwhelmed is that we never define what ‘enough’ looks like. It’s like running a race with no finish line, and no wonder we feel exhausted!

Here’s how this shows up in daily life:

• We overfill our homes with things we don’t need.
• We overwork ourselves because we never feel like we’ve done enough.
• We overthink every decision because we don’t have clear boundaries.

I know because I’ve been there.

For much of my life, I was both a shopaholic and a workaholic, and when I reflect on that time, all I can remember is a constant fear of falling behind. No matter how much I did, it never felt like enough. 

The pressure I put on myself was relentless, but what’s wild is that I can see now how unnecessary it was.

Knowing this, I wish I could sit down with my younger self for a long chat. I’d tell her to think intentionally about her goals and priorities (the ones that truly mattered to her, not everything she thought she had to do!). Then, I’d gently remind her: this is the only life she gets. She deserves to use her time, space, and energy on what truly matters. 

If this is you—if you ever feel like you’re scattered, unsatisfied, and constantly chasing something just out of reach—defining enough on your terms can make a world of difference. 

How to Define ‘Enough’ in Your Own Life

If the idea of setting limits feels uncomfortable, you’re not alone. Our brains often resist this because we’re conditioned to want more. But asking a few simple questions can shift your mindset:

• How much do I actually need to be happy?
• What does ‘finished’ look like for this task or project?
• What if I’ve already done enough?
• What would it take for me to go to bed feeling satisfied?

You might resist these questions at first, but sit with them. Even the tiniest spark of clarity can make a huge difference in your life. I promise this is an opportunity to make massive changes, and the time you invest will be worth it. 

 

What ‘Enough’ Can Look Like

If you struggle to conceptualise what ‘enough’ might look like, here are some different ways to describe it:

• A number limit – e.g., “I only need 10 pairs of socks.” 
• A space limit – e.g., “I’ll only keep what fits in this drawer.” 
• A time limit – e.g., “I’ll only keep as many toys as I can clean up in 15 minutes” (This is a real-life boundary in my home!)

Each of these approaches provides a clear stopping point, which makes decision-making easier and helps prevent burnout. You can also apply these boundaries to things like your schedule (for example, “I’ll only work a maximum of two hours overtime each week”), or you might restrict your number of social engagements. 

Related Post: 9 Actionable Ways To Declutter Your Schedule and Be Less Busy

The Freedom of Defining Enough

Creating clarity and boundaries isn’t about restriction. Instead, it’s about freedom and peace of mind. When you know how much is enough, you also know when you’re done, which means you can finally stop worrying and constantly doing. 

It’s the permission to stop, feel satisfied, and rest at the end of the day.

So I challenge you today: Pick one area of your life—your closet, your to-do list, your schedule—and ask, What does enough look like for me?

You might be surprised by how much lighter you feel when you finally define it.

Looking For More Simple Living Tips?

If you found this helpful, you might also enjoy:

• 17 Heart-Centred Ways to Simplify Your Life
• 11 Daily Habits for Simple Living That Can Change Your Life
• How to Create a Culture of Slow Living
• 15 Things to Declutter That Aren’t Things

 

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